It Was Always You

If there is anything I want to accomplish from blogging it’s that I want to #keepitreal. I feel as though I need to write this blog post from an encounter I had a couple weekends ago, I wasn't sure how to write this blog post until now.

A few weekends ago I was tailgating with family and friends and a girlfriend and I decided to go to the rail yard to grab some drinks and mingle with the crowd. While we were mingling with people we stumbled into this lovely lady who said she reads my blogs and was truly inspired by Shawn and I's love story and that she doesn't feel like she will ever meet a man like Shawn and doesn't believe love like this exists, let me set the record straight...either did I. haha...I feel like a laugh at my own jokes a lot. Sorry....anyway....

It's true though, either did I!! Partly because I wasn't a nice person. Shawn and I meet at a football game in junior high, dated, blah blah blah, junior high and high school romance etc., fast forward to our freshman year of college we talked, Shawn wanted to date, I was immature and went back to my old boyfriend etc. Fast forward to sophomore year of college, Shawn wants to date, I'm immature, it doesn't work out, etc. Fast forward to junior year of college. I think I'm serious about dating Shawn this time, Shawn drives 400 miles to see me, I ditch Shawn because I'm immature and I meet a new guy and start dating him. 

What I feel as though I've forgotten to mention in my blog is that I was a mess. I will never bash on any of the relationships I've had in the past because I believe everything is a stepping stone to your future but we were just toxic for each other. I believe I was suffering and trying to cope with my parents divorce and so I used other ways to cope with my anger and resentment. I drank to much, I partied to hard, I dropped out of college three times, I was living out of my car or on friends couches, and at some point I'm sure my parents started wondering in what direction my life would take me. 

I still don't believe I have it together nor do I have any idea what I want to do with my life but somehow I managed to turn a page by moving to Lincoln and stumbled upon Shawn in a bar and he's never left my side since. I believe there is a higher power and that power knew Shawn and I were supposed to be together. It was as though all these years passed by and Shawn was patiently waiting for me to grow up. 

I don't know what the future looks like for many of you nor can I say what it looks like for me but that girl was right, love like this doesn't come around often. I'm not here to rub Shawn and I's relationship in your faces because we are far from perfect, we have our fights, we get on each others nerves but my point here is that for a long time I could have been in the right relationship but I had a lot of growing to do as a person. I couldn't have a man love me unconditionally until I loved myself first and who knows maybe you're like me and I was just to dumb to see that 

I had a good man standing in front of me this whole time. 

Until Next Time,

Cierra